Did you know there are many rough-and-tumble play benefits for your children? Every time I lay on the floor my girls ( 2 and 6 years old) throw themselves at me and start to play rough-and-tumble and some pretty dangerous games.
I was always a bit scared of those, but they enjoyed it so much, that we did it daily. The more dangerous it was, the more they were screaming with excitement. Those harmless wrestling with kids games were their favorite playtime.
A while ago I accidentally came across the information about how rough and tumble play has a great impact on our kids! I was stunned…
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Rough and Tumble Play Benefits
Let me walk you through some basic information and benefits of rough and tumble play, or wrestling with kids, and then I will show you how we do it.
- First of all, when I say rough, I don’t mean hurting someone or causing pain… Just some at-first-sight rough or dangerous games in a safe and secure area that you have under control.
#1 Release of BDNF
Rough and tumble play leads to the release of Brain-Derived Neurotrophic Factor (BDNF), a type of protein that promotes the growth and survival of neurons. This results in enhanced brain health and cognitive function.
#2 Stress Management
This type of play serves as a mild stressor that teaches children how to manage and cope with uncomfortable and threatening situations. Their heart rate increases, leading to an adrenaline rush, which helps them learn how to regulate their emotions.
#3 Building Social Skills
Rough and tumble play allows children to interact with others, helping in the development of their social skills. They learn how to take turns, negotiate, cooperate, and resolve conflicts, which aid in forming and maintaining social relationships.
#4 Physical Strength
The physical activity involved in rough and tumble play builds muscle strength, enhances coordination and concentration, and contributes to overall cardiovascular fitness.
#5 Emotional Confidence
The unpredictable nature of roughhousing instills a certain level of emotional confidence in children as they learn to tackle challenging situations and manage their emotions accordingly.
#6 Bonding and Connection
Rough play creates opportunities for bonding and connection, as children can perceive their caregivers as fun, trusting, and secure individuals, which strengthens their relationship.
#7 Risk Assessment Skills
Through this type of play, kids learn to assess and navigate risks in a controlled and safe environment, thus improving their problem-solving skills and their ability to make decisions.
#8 Creativity and Imagination
Rough and tumble play often involves role-playing and pretend play, which encourages children to be imaginative and creative.
#9 Improved Self-regulation Skills
Kids learn to control their actions and behaviors, understanding when to stop or change their behavior based on the reactions of others. This is essential for developing empathy and respect for others.
In R&T, role reversal, self-handicapping, and self-control are considered essential skills to succeed socially [19], as these are all practical skills that require physical and motor control related to another person.
National Library of Medicine
#10 Stimulated Interest in Play and Learning
Due to its dynamic and unpredictable nature, rough-and-tumble play keeps children engaged and eager to participate, which boosts their interest in play and learning more broadly.
#11 Improved Language Skills
Children often communicate verbally during these play sessions, strengthening their language skills, expanding their vocabulary, and improving their ability to express thoughts and ideas.
#12 Boosts Mental Health
The fun and joy derived from participating in phisical play can serve as a simple method to boost a child’s mental well-being, making them feel happier, relaxed, and more connected to others.
#13 Development of Sensory Skills
Rough and tumble play often involves various elements that stimulate multiple senses. Running, tumbling, wrestling, and so on aids in the development of visual, tactile, and proprioceptive senses.
#14 Teaches Respect for Boundaries
Through this form of play fighting, children learn to understand and respect the personal boundaries of others. They learn to recognize body language and signals indicating when someone is comfortable or not.
#15 Promotes Persistence and Resilience
As it involves challenges, rough-and-tumble play enables kids to handle setbacks, helping them understand that it’s okay to fail and that they can try again.
#16 Promotes Independence
While under adult supervision, kids still make their own decisions during play, fostering a sense of independence and self-reliance.
#17 Boosts IQ and Academic Performance
Studies have shown a correlation between regular physical activity and improved cognitive function, which potentially results in better academic performance.
The present review of research findings suggests that systematic exercise programs may actually enhance the development of specific types of mental processing known to be important for meeting challenges encountered both in academics and throughout the lifespan.
National Library of Medicine
#18 Enhances Problem-Solving Skills
In the heat of play, children often have to quickly come up with strategies and solutions, which enhances their problem-solving skills.
#19 Promotes Psychological Well-being
Children who engage in rough and tumble play (RTP) exhibit lower levels of anxiety and stress, enjoying an overall higher sense of psychological well-being.
#20 Fosters Leadership Skills
During horseplay, as some call it, opportunities often arise for children to take the lead in games or activities. This can foster early leadership skills, allowing children to guide, delegate, and make decisions.
#21 Broadens Understanding of the Physical World
Through various actions like pushing, pulling, rolling, or jumping, rough and tumble play exposes children to fundamental physics concepts like gravity, force, or motion playfully and engagingly.
#22 Encourages Cooperation and Teamwork
Many physical play scenarios involve working together. As a result, children learn the value of cooperation and teamwork, essential skills for their future social and professional lives.
#23 Develops a Healthy Competitive Spirit
Depending on the activity, kids participating in rough and tumble play might experience winning and losing situations. This can instill a healthy competitive spirit, teaching them to put effort into the task at hand, to accept defeat with grace, and to be humble in victory.
#24 Promotes a Healthy Lifestyle
Physically active children are more likely to become physically active adults. By instilling the value of activity early on, we can help set our kids up for a lifetime of good health and fitness.
#25 Helps Burn Off Excess Energy
Rough and tumble play is a great way for children to burn off excess energy. Physical activity helps to regulate their energy levels, reduce hyperactivity, and improve focus and concentration.
#26 Teaches Them to Protect Themselves
On a practical level, rough and tumble play can teach children some basic self-defense techniques and strategies. It’s not about promoting violence, but providing children with the confidence and ability to protect themselves if needed.
#27 Helps Understand Personal Strengths & Limits
During roughhousing, kids have an opportunity to test and understand their physical strength and limits, leading to better self-awareness.
#28 Promotes Positive Self-esteem
Successes and progress made during rough and tumble play can have a beneficial impact on a child’s self-esteem and sense of self-efficacy. This playstyle encourages them to try new things and discover they can achieve more than they initially believed.
#29 Encourages Patience
Taking turns with siblings to rough play with parents can teach children the virtue of patience.
#30 Improves Sleep Patterns
Regular physical activity, such as that involved in rough and tumble play, can promote better sleeping patterns in children.
#31 Teaches Fairness
Children in rough and tumble play often need to navigate issues of fairness (like taking turns or playing by the rules), which helps develop their understanding of these principles.
#32 Encourages Empathy and Compassion
Engaging in this type of play requires children to be aware of and consider the feelings of others, helping to cultivate a sense of empathy and compassion.
#33 Helps Develop Concentration and Focus
To be successful in many of these play situations, children need to develop and maintain focus. This can help improve their concentration in other areas of life as well.
#34 Enables the Development of Perseverance and Determination
Many forms of rough and tumble play can be challenging. Overcoming these challenges can help instill a sense of perseverance and determination in children.
#35 It is Fun!
Last but not least, rough and tumble play is simply fun. This pack of healthy benefits comes wrapped in a joyful package, which is sure to keep children excited and eager to play. Playing feels good, and it’s these positive experiences that will probably make the biggest difference to a child’s life.
From the children’s perspectives, play is voluntary, free, self-initiated, and self-controlled while also fun, active, spontaneous, unlimited, and natural [4].
National Library of Medicine
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Some Research on Rough-and-Tumble Play with Kids
“Rough-and-tumble play definitely doesn’t make kids more aggressive. And it has lots of social and emotional benefits.” – Educational psychologist Jennifer St George
Educational psychologist Jennifer St George
- Educational psychologist Jennifer St George observed 24 dads and their 4-year-olds playing physical games in recent research published in the journal Infant and Child Development.
- Roughhousing, or play that involves bodily contact, has been demonstrated to assist children to learn to take risks safely, practice understanding others’ emotions, develop impulse control, and learn to deal with frustration, among other things, according to her results.
Types and Examples of Rough and Tumble Play
- Wrestling: This does not entail the professional form of wrestling. Instead, it’s a playful contest on the floor where adults and kids can grapple with each other in a friendly and safe way.
- Tickling games: These are both fun and physically engaging. They can test a child’s ability to handle surprise and unexpected feelings associated with tickling.
- Chase and tagging games: These games involve a substantial amount of running around, which adds to the physical exertion element of play.
- Play fighting: Make-believe scenarios where children pretend to be superheroes or other characters and pretend fight without the goal of causing harm.
- Pillow fights: An extremely fun form of rough and tumble play where children (and often adults too) can play-hit each other with pillows.
- Tug of war: A classic game where two sides pull on opposite ends of a rope, testing their strength and endurance.
- Climbing activities: This can be as simple as a child climbing onto an adult’s back for a piggyback ride, or more structured activities like climbing trees, jungle gyms, or play structures.
Play Fighting With Kids is Pure Fun
- You will see that laughter will release all the stress and they will be calmer, and more cooperative with whatever obligations they have.
- It’s about having fun! Not winning… That is something they will learn and enjoy.
- It’s about spending time with mum or dad, or both, making a stronger connection and feeling so close to you. Roughhousing makes your bond even stronger. They learn you are always ready to have fun, will never hurt them, and will keep them safe.
- Seeing you holding back not to cause pain will teach them self-control. Also, it will teach an older sibling how to play with a younger, smaller brother or a sister… or a friend.
- It’s about moments when everything else disappears… Not one trouble in their mind… Just pure fun and laughing out loud. Doesn’t this sound like paradise for kids?
Everyone Can Do It!
The most benefits get kids from 2 to 8 years old, but hey… Everyone is welcome and having fun has no age limit.
- Children often use this method to show affection for friends, it strengthens their relationship. Parents must always guide them on boundaries and the respect needed when roughhousing with a friend. They must learn that having fun is not so funny anymore. It must be accepted and willingly by both sides.
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Tears During Roughhousing
Tears aren’t as bad as you might think. It is actually a good thing sometimes.
When they start to cry, and it seems it’s because of the game, but if you know that the child didn’t really get hurt... It is actually getting bad feelings out of the system. Something they have been holding back and just couldn’t process, some deep wounds, worries, or memories stuffed somewhere in that wondrous mind of a child.
Let them cry it out… Hold them, and give them comfort. A good cry is something we all should do sometimes. Holding everything and swallowing it inside doesn’t do us any good. So, let them cry and be sad if it comes to that.
Our Rough-and-Tumble Games?
There is no rule actually, most of the time it is just something that comes to us at the moment.
For example:
- I lay on the floor and my girls throw themselves at me, and then I bounce them off as I pretend I am some kind of a monster or a tiger
- Wrestling with kids game... This one my older understands better. It’s a real wrestling match where I try to throw her on her back. I must say, she is pretty strong and I don’t have to pretend I cannot do it ha-ha.
- Pilates ball as a trampoline: I put the ball in the corner of the sofa on the floor, hold it with my knees and they hold my hands and jump really high
- Pillow fight – I think you all know what that looks like, right?!
- Karate fight – We often pretend to have karate fights, but this one needs to be careful, so nobody gets hurt. You can even dress up for it!
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So that you can understand me better maybe it’s better to show you… Check out our short roughhousing compilation. Hope you like it…
Here is one more great video with one great dad and his rough-and-tumble games – The Art of Manliness. Do check it out… Keep up the good work Brett!
FAQ
What is rough and tumble play?
Rough and tumble play is a form of physical play that involves chasing, wrestling, and other playful physical interactions. It is a normal and healthy part of child development, and it can provide children with several benefits
What is the difference between rough and tumble play and bullying?
Rough and tumble play is a playful and consensual form of physical interaction, while bullying is an intentional act of aggression that is intended to harm or intimidate another person. In rough and tumble play, both participants are willing and enjoying the interaction, while in bullying, one participant is not willing or enjoying the interaction.
When should children start rough and tumble play?
Rough and tumble play can be introduced to children as early as infancy. However, it is important to make sure that the play is safe and appropriate for the child’s age and development. For younger children, rough and tumble play should be gentle and focused on non-contact activities, such as tickling and chasing. As children get older, they can engage in more vigorous activities, such as wrestling and roughhousing.
How can parents teach their children about consent and boundaries in rough and tumble play?
Parents can teach their children about consent and boundaries by talking to them about what is and is not acceptable behavior. They can also model consent and boundaries themselves by asking for permission before touching another person and respecting other people’s wishes.
What are some tips for parents to promote safe and healthy rough and tumble play?
Parents can promote safe and healthy rough and tumble play by:
– Supervising children closely during play.
– Creating a safe play environment.
– Setting clear boundaries.
– Teaching children about consent and boundaries.
– Encouraging open communication about feelings and needs.
How can parents help children who are reluctant to engage in rough and tumble play?
Parents can help children who are reluctant to engage in rough and tumble play by:
1. Understanding their child’s personality and preferences.
2. Offering alternatives to rough and tumble play, such as cooperative games or imaginative play.
3. Encourage them to observe other children playing.
4. Gradually introducing them to more physical activities.
To Wrap It Up
Enjoy rolling on the floor with your little ones, wake up the baby inside you. I am sure there are lots of benefits for us adults also. If nothing, just seeing their smile makes us happier and healthier.
Enjoy…
And remember…
WE ARE STRONGER THAN WE ALL THINK!
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15 comments
In many ways, we have become very sensitive to how one course of action affects another. This can be hugely beneficial but sometimes it can be a situation in which we take away joy for no payoff. I was never much for roughhousing but for people to jump to thinking it is abuse is quite an assumption.
I love this post so much. I think it’s important to remember that roughousing and abuse are two entirely different things. AND that roughousing does not promote violence.
I think roughhousing has got a bad wrap over the years. There’s something to be said for physical play. It’s not bad by any means. Love it.
I loved roughhousing when I was growing up. I have such fond memories of rolling around on the floor with my father.
My husband is the roughhouser in our family. He started with our son and now he wrestles a bit with our daughter. Everyone has great fun — except me. I am always worried about injuries LOL
It’s such a fun activity to do with kids. I don’t see this as a problem if it’s done in a safe way. My son and my husband enjoy it very much. I usually join in and then we have triple fun! Great article.
I think, through the physical play of roughhousing, kids gain emotional intelligence, joy, morality, physical fitness, and wisdom. I was never much for this activity. Still, as long as it follows basic safety rules, it can have significant benefits for both kids and adults.
I love how you highlighted the benefits of this type of play. Like you mentioned, one of the most important parts of this is making sure you’re “in a safe and secure area that you have under control.” I’m sure your kids absolutely love getting to play with mom & dad like this on a daily basis!
Roughhousing as a kid taught me to respect people’s boundaries and how to express mine as well. It’s fun and harmless if you listen to one another!
Personally i love roughhouse because it is sometimes creative and fun for kids. Thanks for sharing with us
Roughhousing is always fun! We usually do this on the weekend and brings so much joy to the family!
This is the first time I heard about roughhousing. It seems like its “tough love” but I think it has benefits. I will never assume that it is abuse.
This is really fun! My kids love roughhouses too when they were small!
While I thought pretty much everyone would rough house with their children, I never thought that it could actually be beneficial – just a fun way to connect with your kids. Interesting. Blessings
So funny you say this. My son is 4 and his teacher just explained how important rough housing is!