Yes, my personality changed after having a baby. Regardless of the traits, you were born with, whether you are a withdrawn person, shy or timid… once you become a mum, you are a stronger woman, a lioness. Trust me, you are! It’s written in our bones.
When my firstborn entered this world, the most challenging part was the constant visits from friends and family who wanted to see the baby. During the first three weeks, I couldn’t even find a moment to sit down. My breasts were extremely painful, and sleep was nearly impossible. I was constantly afraid of making a mistake and potentially harming my precious little one. It was a time filled with worry and anxiety.
Postpartum Visits
The first visit was 4 weeks postpartum. I am a lucky mum because Dad has done almost all the work to prepare everything for the guests and serve them. Love you, Dad!
Exhaustion was not only felt by my body but also by my soul. I can only imagine how it affected my baby. Our home was a magical cave, where the three of us lived by our own rules. Let’s just say it was my bubble of joy and love.
And they all contributed to the chaos and mess.
For the next 3 months, we had postpartum visits sometimes up to 3 per week. My daughter, as I wrote before had the worst witching hours… especially after guests. Every visit her screaming was a cry for help and it was like she was saying something to me, but I just didn’t hear her.
They all had to take her into their arms, toss and turn just to show how they all knew it and were full of advice on what to do, or not to do.
I just watched it all silently, being a person who never tells my peace of mind, biting my nails from behind, and feeling like a total fool.
One night, after a roller-coaster some guests prepared, she was screaming…
And suddenly it hit me! I finally understood what she was saying….
Wake Up Time – My Baby Needs Me
I am a mom, and this little creature is my baby…. Unprotected, incapable of defending herself, to tell me what she needs or what bothers her…
So why am I here…
I am here to be her voice.
Who is gonna protect her?
Who is gonna roar when someone exceeds the limits?
Who is gonna take her into her arms and make her feel safe and sound?
Who is her other half, the only one that she knows so well… Me of course…
Her MOM!
That Moment a Lioness Was Born – a Stronger Woman
I cried, ashamed of myself, and felt I had let her down. So I promised her that night:
I am here now, and I will never ever let you down again. I am your mom, and I will protect you with every part of my being. I know you and I will react even if I thought it wasn’t in my nature, I woke up. You woke me up. I am here now… I promise you. How can you learn to defend yourself if I don’t show it to you? I will, always… You are my cub, I am your lioness… forever.
My Personality Changed After Having a Baby
The next day I was a new person, I realized my personality changed after having a baby. A new, stronger woman was born.
It wasn’t one of those promises you make at night but forget all about it in the morning.
From that day forward, I remained the same silly person for myself, but for her, I made sure to express my feelings to anyone who deserved it. Some people were surprised, and others were even insulted at times, but deep down, I knew I had done everything right.
The same was with my second-born, just easier LOL.
I am proud of my enlightenment, my decisions, and my actions.
I am a lioness now, a stronger woman….
So are you. If your inner lioness is not there yet, wake her up! Yes, you can, and you will.
If you need me or my advice, let me know, I will be honored to help you. We mums must stick together and help each other.
I am writing this for you, the sleeping one…. Wish I knew this from the start. We sometimes learn the hard way. Or maybe all things happen for a reason.
And remember…
WE ARE STRONGER THAN WE ALL THINK!
Some Research on The Topic
Does Motherhood Change Personality?
Motherhood can indeed change a person’s personality. Here’s how and why:
- Hormonal and brain changes: Pregnancy and lactation hormones can alter the brain, increasing the size of neurons in some regions and producing structural changes in others. Activity increases in regions that control empathy, anxiety, and social interaction, while gray matter becomes more concentrated. These changes help attract a new mother to her baby and contribute to feelings of overwhelming love, fierce protectiveness, and constant worry.
- Enhanced amygdala: The growth of the amygdala in a new mother’s brain makes her hypersensitive to her baby’s needs. This heightened emotional response can lead to changes in personality, such as increased empathy and a stronger focus on caregiving.
- Changing priorities: Motherhood often brings a shift in priorities, with the well-being and needs of the child taking precedence over the mother’s own desires and interests. This change in focus can lead to shifts in personality traits, such as increased responsibility and selflessness.
- Emotional vulnerability: Many mothers experience a heightened emotional vulnerability, particularly in relation to the well-being of their children. This can lead to changes in personality, such as increased empathy, sensitivity, and a greater understanding of loss and grief.
- Positive personality trait development: The transition to parenthood has been found to trigger positive personality trait change in early adulthood, according to Social Investment Theory (SIT). This theory suggests that the investment of time, energy, and resources in raising a child can lead to personal growth and development, resulting in positive changes in personality.
- Reduced negative traits: Some women report that becoming a mother has helped them shed negative aspects of their personality. The responsibility and love associated with motherhood can motivate individuals to work on self-improvement and let go of harmful behaviors or attitudes.
- Stability of personality: While there are significant changes in a woman’s brain and behavior during motherhood, personality traits overall tend to remain stable during the transition from late pregnancy to early motherhood[3]. This suggests that while there may be some shifts in specific traits, the core aspects of a person’s personality remain relatively unchanged.
More for you to read
- Hypothyroidism during pregnancy
- How to deal with the first day in daycare
- Can crafting help with postpartum depression?
- Remember everything from your baby’s life
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